Book Review: SPARE by Prince Harry “The Duke of Sussex”

Throughout SPARE, Harry, the author, chronicles his formative years, the profound impact that the death of his mother, Diana, Princess of Wales, had on him, his adolescence, and his subsequent deployment to Afghanistan as a member of the British Army. The individual in question composes an autobiography detailing his interactions with his brother, Prince William, his father, King Charles III, and his father’s marital union with Camilla Parker Bowles. Additionally, the book explores the author’s engagement in matrimony and subsequent separation from the royal family, involving the American actress Meghan Markle.

Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex KCVO (Henry Charles Albert David) is a member of the British royal family. He is sixth in line of succession to the British throne, the younger son of Charles III and Diana, Princess of Wales, and the younger brother of William, Prince of Wales.

1. Your trauma is valid. Even if others have had it worse. Even if someone else who has had the same experience does not feel incapacitated by it. Even if it was entirely avoidable, even if it took place a long time ago, even if no one is aware, your experience is real and valid, and you deserve a safe place to talk about it. Your suffering is significant. Your expertise is valuable. And your healing is important. Nothing or no one can take that away from you.

2. Being wealthy and having a high social status could not be better. Someone may be in a safe setting yet still feel insecure. Happiness is related to the sensation that emerges from accomplishment rather than the accomplishment itself.

3. Be brave enough to choose your path despite obstacles and criticism. Courage helps us overcome obstacles. We’ll inevitably face obstacles, setbacks, and challenges along the way. But with courage, we can overcome them. Courage gives us the strength and resilience to keep going, even when things get tough. 

4. Comparison and inequality are damaging to self-esteem. Comparing ourselves to others often results in a diminished sense of self-worth, low self-esteem, and constant dissatisfaction. This negative self-perception can hinder our overall mental well-being and affect our lives. Increased Stress and Anxiety – Engaging in comparisons with others has the potential to initiate a recurring pattern of tension and anxiety.

5. Love and nurture your wounded inner child. Some people with a wounded inner child will experience a sense of disconnect or incoherence. Your inner child self may have more to reveal about challenges from the past. Reinforce the connection you’ve opened by affirming your intent to continue listening, offering love and compassion, and working to heal any remaining wounds.

6. Seeking help from a mental health expert is not a sign of weakness. Past trauma can be pretty upsetting. Therapists aim to establish a secure environment in which you can begin to navigate this emotional turbulence and discover helpful skills for healing your inner child. Therapists understand how childhood traumas and prior events can impact your life, relationships, and overall well-being. 

7. Griefing is personal, and everyone has different ways to overcome it. Coping with the loss of a friend and, especially, a family member may be one of the most difficult challenges that many of us face. Loss is understandable; although shock and perplexity are a standard part of life, they can lead to protracted bouts of melancholy or depression. The sadness usually fades with time, but grieving is an important step for overcoming these feelings and cherishing the time you spent with your loved one.

8. Respect others’ boundaries and personal lives. It is critical to understand your habits and the things that are affecting you. Give your wants, problems, and the effects on your relationships some thought before establishing a barrier.

9. Serve and respect humanity. Respecting humankind is something all humans are born with. Simply by being human, all people deserve respect. Every human being is born free and with equal dignity and rights, whatever their status in life.

10. Process, don’t suppress emotions, it is okay for men to cry. Most of the men wouldn’t cry, or they should hide their emotions. But in truth, is it okay for men to cry, no matter your gender. If you tend to suppress or ignore your unpleasant feelings in order to protect yourself, you may have a “repressive coping style,” according to specialists. Adverse effects of repressive coping are possible, particularly in terms of mental health.

11. Choose healthy ways to heal. Medicating with alcohol and drugs doesn’t solve the problem. Many of us are using drugs to try to alter how we feel during these anxious and distressing times. Some use them in an attempt to manage the symptoms of their mental condition. We refer to this as “self-medication.” Alcohol and drugs might exacerbate the symptoms of your mental condition. You can enhance your general mood and well-being and manage your challenges in a healthier and more productive way.

12. Hold space for those who are hurting. Holding space means showing up for someone, being fully present and without judgment as you sit with them during difficult times. You pay close attention. You allow yourself to feel their suffering and unpleasant feelings so they don’t have to.

13. Know when to walk away from a toxic environment. When the relationship causes you so much stress that it interferes with crucial aspects of your life at work, at home, or both. When your emotions are entirely consumed with defending and explaining yourself, and the chaos of your interactions with these people is all you talk about, it is time to let go.

14. Safety is more important than fame. Fame is quite appealing because it provides numerous advantages. The fantasies go like this: when you are famous, your excellent reputation follows you wherever you go. However, security is more vital. In the long term, guarantee gives enjoyment.

15. Be genuine, brave, and faithful to your values. Being true to yourself means that what you say in life corresponds to your actions. Your authentic self extends beyond your job, assets, or who you are to someone. It is the essence of who you are.

My Thoughts

Spare is Prince Harry’s deeply personal memoir, where he reflects on the impact of his mother Diana’s death, his time in the British Army, and his relationships with his father, King Charles III, and brother, Prince William. He shares his journey of stepping back from royal duties alongside his wife, Meghan Markle, exploring themes of identity, family tensions, and the struggle to break free from royal expectations. Through it, Harry offers a candid view of his life within—and eventually outside of—the monarchy.

4.5 out of 5 out of 111,018 ratings

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A multi-award-winning blogger and advocate for OFWs and investment literacy; recipient of the Mass Media Advocacy Award, Philippine Expat Blog Award, and Most Outstanding Balikbayan Award. Her first book, The Global Filipino Bloggers OFW Edition, was launched at the Philippine Embassy in Kuwait. A certified Registered Financial Planner of the Philippines specializing in the Stock Market. A recognized author of the National Book Development Board of the Philippines. Co-founder of Teachers Specialist Organization in Kuwait (TSOK) and Filipino Bloggers in Kuwait (FBK). An international member of writing and poetry. Published more than 10 books.  Read more: About DiaryNiGracia